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Do we have to get married as part of the process?

The answer is no. But it is important to understand that there may be implications to not being married. Roy and I, for example, decided to take advantage of the surrogacy process and get married in the United States, in addition to the family party we had in Israel the previous year.

So how will getting married help us?

A. It will open up more states for surrogacy: Some U.S. states only permit surrogacy for married couples. It doesn’t matter whether you are a male couple, as long as you have a ring on your finger. Texas is an example of such a state.

B. The ease of proving your relationship: For legal processes in the United States and in Israel, it’s important to establish and reinforce your relationship with the various authorities, and a wedding will definitely give you more legal legitimacy. Obviously it’s not the be-all end-all and you can get by without a marriage certificate (there’s also living together, a surrogacy agreement that you signed together, and more), but it definitely helps.

So although in Israel we can’t legally get married, other places in the world fortunately do enable it, and further to the High Court petitions filed, the State of Israel is required to recognise gay marriages and therefore you will also be able to register as a married couple in Israel.

To sum things up,

you don’t have to get married if you are opposed to it, but it’s important to understand the advantages it will afford you. Aside from it being an exciting ceremony, especially if you do it in the midst of a process to expand your family. (Our surrogate was one of the witnesses at our wedding!).

I’ve prepared a few wedding guides for you under the Guides tab. Share your photos with us!

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