Questions for your first call with a surrogacy agency

The agency is one of the two organisations that will shape your journey. Its job is to find you a suitable surrogate, make sure the screening matches your profile and your clinic's and the law's requirements, and support you through everything local for the length of the process.

On a first call, listen for experience — with surrogacy generally, and with international clients specifically. Ask whether they pay referral commissions to whoever sent you, and what the cost would have been had you come directly.

You do not need to work through every question. The point is to arrive prepared, and then listen.

Worth knowing: you will usually speak to the owner, not necessarily the people who will actually handle your case. That is information too.

Finding and screening a surrogate

• Can you tell us about the process? How do you find, screen and choose an applicant?
• What screening tools do you use to find the right surrogate for us?
• Do you perform psychological evaluations before you offer a match? If not, what evaluations do you perform?
• Do you run criminal background checks before adding applicants to your database?
• If the applicant is married, what screening does her husband go through?
• Do you obtain her medical records, and does a fertility specialist review them before she is offered to us? In other words — how do we know she is medically suitable?
• How long does it take to find a suitable match?
• Are there candidates available in the near future?
• Do you offer us a list of potential applicants, or one at a time?
• What are your criteria for a match? How do you decide who is best for us?
• Who arranges and runs the first meeting between us and the surrogate?
• What states do your applicants come from? Are there legal restraints or conditions we should know about?

Managing the process

• How do you manage the process for us, from choosing a surrogate through transfer and pregnancy? How do you stay in touch with her?
• What are the overall costs?
• Can you provide a list of expenses and prices? How many unforeseen expenses can there be?
• Will we have access to her medical records relating to the pregnancy? How will we receive updates?
• How does the birth work — can we be there? Who handles the hospital, and tells them this is a surrogacy and that we are the parents?
• Who is in charge of the legal side in the US — the birth certificate, and severing the surrogate's parental tie, pre-birth or post-birth?
• Has a surrogate ever refused to give up the baby? How is that handled?

About the agency

• How many years of matching experience do you have?
• How many intended parents have hired you in the last three years? And in the last year?
• Who are the staff who will handle us, and what is their experience?
• Is there a lawyer at the agency? What do they handle?
• What is your speciality? What sets you apart from other agencies?

Insurance

• How do you handle the surrogate's medical insurance? What does it cost? Who finds and buys the policy?
• How do you handle the babies' medical insurance before we travel home? Can you help? Is there NICU cover for twins?

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Ask me about anything that still feels missing, and talk to other parents who have worked with the agency you are considering — so the decision fits you, your profile and your situation.

Good luck.